she breathes the air & flies away

2009-08-27T08:35:00.000+08:00

hellooo!

glad to be back here again. thanks for keeping the dust away. (= one thing's for sure, the last post is dedicated to sir.

schedule has never been so hectic, ever. i could never find time for myself. i barely stay home for many months. it's madness, i tell you. now that exams are over, breather has found my way. traveling one more time. i'll be flying, my dear.

and my bad, this is way in advance,
happy burfdae, joebear and xavier lee hong qi.

when you still can't feel and you can't stay, then i am gone.

goodnight. farewell. orevwa. toodles. later.

p.s. catch signwithloaf voxing if you care. (= find me there. ruuun..

2009-07-31T22:36:00.002+08:00

(dengdengdeng)
ahhh!

zombies ate your brains.

2009-06-29T02:24:00.002+08:00

too alarming now to talk about. my eyes wouldn't lie seven times. seriously.

dooode!

2009-05-18T23:46:00.003+08:00

i just feel like spraying my weapon on the overwhelming zombies!

i'll miss the way he shoots like a pro.
i'm seriously gonna miss the way jiawei smiles and waves every single time.

2009-05-11T23:25:00.003+08:00

thoughts running in the head.

kinderferrerobueno smashed up in a cake, sweeet. promisingly, you don't grumble when you get to melt it in your mouth.
we took pictures of all the food but forgotten to snap a shot at the cake.
a double chocolate muffin treat from lines. i really appreciate it. thank you! (=
vampire weekend makes me move silly. still not sure why i'd twist and turn more than threesixty degrees on a chair while the songs are on.
i am guilty of bringing a refrigerator to school.
why tingaling says i'm romantic. (ho nooo!) ahhh. i naturally get all the creeps.
ever since saturday, an animal world revolves around me. the problem statement, the lesson, the conversations, the sharing of interests, exchanging stories, and some more conversations. been extremely fun! hahah. slap and kick, irwan's geram! (= yea. i get that.
the unexpected hellos and name screams made me smile. thank yoooooo!
laughing over the embarassment when an old friend of mine shouts my other name while the unfamiliar ones are present around me. haha.
every pea plant, we get back to the bathroom floor, once more. (=
my pea partners are the interestingly funny people. we'd always have entertainment sorta stuff to share, kid around and joke.
and i laugh so much, but forgot why. (this makes me seem like i'm mad or something. not!)
looked through glass, the man stretches his hand out slowly, trying to wave but fail. hilarious scene.
going to school gets better again.
besides fact from just now at school, the crappy ill power switch cut off my laptop power. twice. i haven't said my goodnights.
total abandonment, not really. (=
thank god for shirin. thank you, shirin! (=

capturing thoughts isn't easy to accomplish. they're forever running.

2009-05-04T22:25:00.004+08:00

i sang my heart out. and i screamed till these lungs of mine gave out.

and then, i couldn't go on forever like this because i've got homework to do.

it's okay.

2009-04-16T23:00:00.007+08:00

two people picked me out on the street and started throwing questions at me. scared the crap out of me. eventually, they managed to convince me to follow them. what the hell did i just get myself into? brought me into the elevator and hit floor eighteen. i got so worried that i tried reading their eyes to check if they're sincere or just bullshitting, but trying to capture me! felt a teeny weeny bit at ease, the eyes looked desperately fine. oh, panicked even more, to the extent, i had to search for my cell buried in a bag. to be prepared! i've watched taken. that film triggered me to react that way. call and shout as much! panicked some more when i think about the running low battery. oh, luck. then, they kept going on and on and on. turned out sounding like alalalalalalala.

another mall gathering, late for the reason of that whole occurrence. in chronological order, i could say one word, invent an anecdote, explain with a story and figure the bottom line. stoned, two to three times, after that. others were telling me things, i couldn't really hear. amplified background noises, minimized surround sound, voices. oh my gawd. my five bucks. yusof bin ishak the great one on that awesome green note. it's gone. i got conned.

p.s. matt giraud just made me scream!

2009-04-15T10:27:00.003+08:00

rachel:
why do you have a copy of the shining in the freezer?

joey:
oh, i was reading it last night, and i got scared, so.

rachel:
you're safe from it if it's in the freezer?

joey:
well, safer. y'know, i mean i never start reading the shining, without making sure we've got plenty of room in the freezer, y'know.

they had this part in friends broadcasted on television before i went to bed.

and in the morning, i woke up, only to find one copy lying there by my bedside. and i figured who would be as weird to do stuff like that. hence, i text the pig.

me:
how come there's this shining book beside meeeee. hahaha.

kempson:
haha. yesterday, joey was reading this book. put it in the fridge if you're scared. haha.

it's been nice.

samson:
dululululu.

me:
toottoottoottooooot.

2009-04-12T21:20:00.004+08:00

can't believe, i'm updating this post.

i got out of the house when church mass didn't start until fifty-nine minutes time. listened to snow patrol's run where i was a walking zombie. guess people would be wondering, that's the saddest girl they've ever seen. man! and i thought, yea, gary lightbody's right. i really should light up.

i prayed this time, for whatever's coming for me. whatever that makes them happy, please do, let their dreams come true. so instantly, it did!

there are voices, shouting out loud. and i can't make those noises go away. i just wish the house stays. the family stays. what i heard, the decision's final. i have to pack stuff. super cereals. i got one week of vacation left before school begins. what luck. at such timing. then i don't wanna spend the last week sealing stuff in moving boxes.

i'm at my cousin's place now. they followed me here. where on earth am i gonna live my life in another month?

toodle noodle, pop and mom.

2009-03-21T05:50:00.005+08:00

my nose!

breathe. suck in. crinkle, crinkle. up, down, left, right. (L1, L2, R1, R2, start, select.) 360 degrees motion. suck in!

wait for me.

2009-03-10T21:21:00.002+08:00

alalalalalalala
ahahahaaa
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

i can't believe it either.

2009-03-09T23:43:00.002+08:00

i still wear my contact lenses despite the pain hurting my eyes. and guess what. freakishly odd things had happened. the one with the missing piece, it's gone! i mean i expect to see it incomplete but i don't! it's fixed, restored, however you say. then the second thing, is a toothpick! a new random toothpick, i was gripping with my fingertips. gripped it for more than a minute. then suddenly, i felt it bent. obviously, normal people would check to see how did it happen. i was normal at that time. hah. the shocking truth is staring back at me. the toothpick's bent because it's been burnt. what. am i producing heat. i got hotness at my fingertips. hahaha. shucks. freaking awesome!

sleep.

2009-03-08T23:04:00.006+08:00

for days, i remember not removing my contact lenses. even though they're fresh and new. what went wrong. one had irregular shape. it doesn't curve the usual way. doesn't look complete. paranoid, the tiny fragment might still be in my right eye. wednesday, i had those pieces put on. i couldn't care less. oh. i like the cathay cineleisure best. we caught a movie. thursday, we had dinner at delifrance. i used to have my favourite deli potato and soup with my buddies. but i doubt they no longer sell it. it's alright. i like france. i've got my france happy flippers too. i still really want to say hello to zidane. friday, i still had them on. eyes felt itchy, i needed to close my eyes. went back to school for some super extreme stuff. i'd never give up. thank goodness, the event was postponed. next, proceeded to mars. interesting experience. saturday, slept with my lenses again. i woke up late! late for brunch appointment. the alarm clock works no more. then, eyes and brain got to be connected some way. totally forgot about the phone. seriously, what's wrong. lucky, jas found me. her phone took a suicide mission too. resorted to public phones, reception counter phone and free internet sms at the cathay. heehee. i love the movie that we all watched. sunday, a really bad blurry vision. worse than a day before. two hours late to meet the rest. in the evening, there are sooo many freaks taking walks at orchard. i forgotten it's sunday! i just wanted to scream ga(gee-ay) to anyone that gets in my way. AHHH. check out the mega sinful chocolates i didn't realize i would consume. within three hours, inside of me. the chocolate oreo ice blended drink, oreo mcflurry, chocolate sundae and double chocolate frappe. slurp slurp. haaa.

i am watching the matrix now. more like catching keanu reeves in the act. the film's as old as ten years ago. keanu reeves and i are only one day away for our birth dates. i know all these. i am a nerd that does research. keanu reeves is awesome, from toe to his hair on top of his head. the day the earth stood still, he speaks mandarin, cute. sweet november, he's a heartthrob and sweetie, i love him. i want to say hello to keanu reeves.

i have finally removed my contact lenses and put on my frames. just like keanu reeves too. haha.

eggs, very nice. (= heard many lost their holidays to do attachments. a pity, i have to go do project stuff tomorrow again. may the force be with you.

i haven't typed sensible rubbish for the longest time. just hold on.

2009-03-05T23:21:00.004+08:00

fun time at the department store. all of us shared smelling the perfumes together. and people could hear us saying stuff.

jasmine:
okay.
nice.
not bad.
dreamy.
fruity.

kenneth:
nice.
sweet.
stinks.
stink bomb.
alcohol.
toilet.

me:
SWEET.
ugh.
balm.
glue plus alcohol.
(cough and step back)
(keeping to myself, i know the cigarette smoke smell's familiar, it's on someone i know.)

it was pouring water and clear soup. walking the long way back home from the carpark, i couldn't resist singing. the last song from the car.

me:
lost and insecure..

kempson:
you found me, you found me, lying on the floor..

me:
surrounded, surrounded.

kempson:
why'd you have to wait?

me:
where were you? where were you? just a little late.

kempson:
you found me, you found me.

smile. (=

oooh. it sucks, i don't wanna get back to stress again. just so you know, you can help me out. don't think it's only me, think about saving lives. (= if your friday night were not meant to be spent on mars or in woods, beat it!

2009-02-16T23:31:00.010+08:00

probably, you'd never guess what i just did.

first time, i took the lift down and started jumping inside. oh yea, it was silly of me. only to stop, when i felt the elevator wasn't as steady and thought to myself, the metal box could plunge right down. or the last thing i would want is to get stucked. it all happened because i heard bimbo friend is coming back that made me overjoyed. heehee. second time, i took the lift down, stayed motionless. still. to send her off in a car ride back, somewhere, i dreaded and dragged my feet.

i miss her already.

pre-valentine's,
spent the day and half the night with lines! it's already rare to keep her at my side around 2100. yea. whooops. (= nice to have her screaming and laughing and giggling and everything.

sour faces from the candies to i-don't-care about the next date.

post-valentine's,
the brother and sister went out to have some fun. such like pampering myself with a scrumptious meal. thecoffeeconnoisseur was heaven to me. (explain more in a bit.) didn't know i like taking it all out on the arcade games machine. really effective way of destressing. and the movie slumdog millionaire is highly recommended. two thumbs up by me. say, like watching drama, action, thriller, comedy, romance, culture, reality, game, musical, all smashed up and fitted perfectly in one film. nice.

this orangeoreo mix tastes so great, they'd lift you up to the heavens. imagine, like i floated without even trying to levitate.

eyeing on the lasagna. oh so yummay! and the cool swing. anyone could spin like threehundredsixty degrees in that. i wanted to carry home.

do you know this.
only you. you don't have to try. you're such a good friend. you're so nice and you're so smart. if only you could pretend i didn't break your heart. many bizillion memories we had. i think about you once in a while. i dream about you almost of all days. and i figured out on my own, that you have to be my constant.

2009-02-11T22:59:00.017+08:00

look what one of these polaroid pictures is telling you. (=

fall out boy really came to singapore! serious.

i jabbed myself, slapped, stepped my own foot, pinched my fats and felt the hardcore bass beats.

i'm not dreaming this time.

imagine, pete's playing to thriller.

and this could be headfirst slide into cooperstown on a bad bet.

bang to america's suitehearts.

patrick's wailing guitar to beat it.

the take over, the break's over.

again, singing out how much he doesn't care.

admiring the left side of pete's eye.

i think i love this shot. detox, just to retox!

it has been rocking awesome! time with them was short. they had to leave the stage.

i knew, i wanted more.

oh, what a night. thanks for the memories. (=

2009-02-10T15:11:00.003+08:00

excitement. anticipation. reaching to the climax, soon.

whack it!

2009-02-03T18:48:00.019+08:00

fun with polaroids. (= shake it, sh-shake it, shake it like a polaroid picture.

w56e, the pharmatoxicology class!
i am going to miss adilah! the online conversation we had in class, when we're footsteps away. all the ranting and something to talk about, almost always.
huijun, friendly and nice to talk to person.
faisal, wherever he is, his missing-in-action will also be missed.
reuel, i remember the one that effortlessly collected personal information on the first lesson. the chat-a-lot and also, clever boy.
karswaran, his interest in photography. that's easy to see only on the last lesson together. oh funny man.
andy, the friendly one that i've coincidentally met at compass point cold storage.
gweneal, got to tell her to watch friends. (= haha. i remember something, otherwise. heehee. garfield, garfield!
weisi, the girl with long hair. independent worker. she reminded me, sharing a pizza! (=
jieying, smart and sarcarstic person. haha.
raudah, she's a little reserved but she is well-equipped with knowledge! good job for that!
nadia, tan! heehee. she enjoys grooving to her music and confessed before that she likes calling me, allison lam! (=
haidah, you're gorgeous kay. (=
eugene, the lots-of-nonsense person. oh gaaawd. talking and talking. but i like! keeps me entertained. hahahee.
nurulain, real, nice and friendly.
harveer, friendly not because she watches friends. heehee.
yoges, has the falling-in-love-over-again face when she speaks to someone special on her cell phone. (=
natasya, amy! hahaha.
ooh, shirin! ship jeom manjeome ship jeom! (= never known we'd be close and talking so much. sooo much!

sweet notes from w54c, the analytical instrumentation class! i have no idea who wrote which. but it's been nice with some of them.
guhen, the floorball player and friendly guy.
rohinee and amareet, forget me not, 'cause i'm the peacemaker! (=

w56c, the biochemistry class!
and they said, the mateys are super competitive to the extreme maximum! really. yet have come to known, they are nice people too. i still remember the first team. aidil, syazrul, naz, mazlina and allison. the entire team love catching friends! and the team is never quiet and afraid to share about anything, not related to the lesson. haha.
aidil, we talk about music at most times.
syazrul, disturbing and acting unfriendly. haha.
naz, specially love joey!
mazlina, phoebe, hoebe, oebe, ebe, be, e-ello, mate!
fatin, and i been sharing clips to laugh about. the one that introduced how i met your mother.
tinghui, so nice, friendly, funny, and laugh-y. hahaha.
jasper, that never fail to poke into business when we're in the same team. he's okay. (=
sitt hui, the smart and diligent one. there are times to take it easy man. (=
hilyah, hello, smiley and wavey.
rul, the ever crazy one.
vidya, the one with beauty and brains.
jeremy, the scientific man. he always explain stuff in what-else-but-the-scientific way.
melvin, the no-longer-threadless-anymore guy. really helpful and never afraid to speak his mind. thank you!

w56b, the medical technology class!
hanisah, gets really high in the morning and that lasts through the day. very funny.
irwan, likes to disturb and does funny stuff. unpredictable. haha.
satish, the joker.
maylwin, the nice and kind-hearted lady. and giggly. heeheehee.
anna, the really confused and blur one. still wavey to me!
nurulhuda, equips herself with lots of onions. the girl that likes to wear shoes! (=
herlina, the blog shopper. laid-back, and friendly.
aishah, the twilighter! very friendly too.
azie, in that one time of sugar rush that gets you soo high!
suhana, i hear her making effort to say hello and goodbye every time.
amanda, loves dbsk and her voice is amplifiable. (=

w56e, the pharmaceutical legislation and marketing(catches breathe) class!
most of all, same faces.
shamala, the kind and always seemingly happy!
izmir, taking on chances and giving answers with every mighty shot. random like you'll never gonna know what he's gonna do afterwards.
shirin, one more time. whether or not we're in the same class in the future, i'm gonna miss you and your silly movements. may it be lip-synching, singing, dancing, crazing, flimsying, hahaha.

not so picture perfect. note: some names mentioned above didn't appear in any of the polaroid pictures. i've yet to receive more pictures, yea.

in summary, i would like to show major appreciation. you all would know if you understand that it's you. thanks,
for being a tease and apologizing to me.
for getting me, exposed to korean music. 2pm, to be more specific.
for the encouragement in visiting youtube more often.
for the encouragement in visiting twilightsingapore too.
for sharing interesting, funny, hilarious video clips. sharing to the extend where sending offline messages is necessary.
for sharing korean drama too.
for sharing many songs. from rock to movie soundtracks to r&b.
for lending the nintendo ds, just so i can play and get happier.
for helping one another out with our allocated tasks. teaching with super dope patience.
for giving load of sweets, goodies to me.
for writing my name in korean.
for making me laugh when singing abc.
for providing free entertainment.
for making effort in singing and dancing for me.
for deciding to order threadless shirts together.
for offering me a jacket when i was snuffling so bad, even when i was already wearing one.
for asking questions and being frank.
for assuming that i've got the answers to your questions.
for getting me to open up and start being all happy and full of some things to share and talk about.
for visiting me in the classroom.
for taking up their time to sit or stand beside me.
for remembering that my name's Allison.
for also calling me alli.
for telling me that i ain't quiet.
for telling me that i look local.
for not minding that i daydream and get lost.
for helping me by all sorts to increase my volume.
for asking to have lunch together.
for not taking into account that i reject and would still ask if there's anything i'd like to get.
for asking me if i need to get anything on their way down for break.
for asking me a favour to buy food or tissue paper, on my wandering way out.
for finding me slow or fast in eating.
for listening to what i have to say.
for observing that i don't leave the classroom at all. (only happens for biochemistry lessons)
for asking me to be a companion, with or without any purpose.

thanks yall! woohoo! remember to wave and call my name. name's, Allison. (=

peace!

2009-01-31T03:13:00.006+08:00

the third night over here. here at cuzzie jasmine's place. we were supposed to play wii. man, fail. cuzzie florence fell asleep watching yeeba yeeba, aunduhlay aunduhlay(old school cartoon) even cuzzie kenneth crashed on the couch. haha. what do i do.

i haven't been playing too much ever since the first meeting on wednesday. tried staying extremely calm and relax but i am tense! woohoo! still tense. this is serious now. i am serious. in serious crap. gotta do serious stuff. and to remind my team mates again, don't stress man. i'm well-aware of that too. seriously, ice creaaaaaaam.

rewind more, i bumped my head by accident at the point where i was washing car. damn, it happened so fast, i wasn't ready to melt like that. after screaming for one short moment, i went silent. i think i lost brain bits and pieces. the pain fades away and sinks back in, every now and then. i don't know man. ever since that incident, i do a lot of unusual stuff, that following days. gaawd, i don't remember!

the sixteen weeks were interesting with people. people i met in different classes. with different attitudes. me, living in different atmospheres. lucky, i haven't mistakenly been to the wrong classroom. oh what fun. from strangers to acquaintances and some to friends. nice.

also, italian meals and treats that last week of school. lasagna, pizzas, ice cream brownies, spaghetti, pizzas, ice cream. one happening and italian week for me.

chinese new year was all laughter, food, and entertainment. haha. cedric and mitchell were constantly eating in every house they've been to. say, like four houses we visited in a day, they've been grabbing all the food they could find, putting them in their mouth. smiling, giggling, and laughing. much sounds they made. uuh, and we too, made sounds. all sorts. all forms man. sure.

who kissed me on my cheek! ahhh. i don't really like it. nooooo. sorry.

the cold of the wind. shivering. i better start running under a blanket before it turns stronger, enough to blow my brains away.

one more thing. kemp seemed serious about the tickets to fall out boy concert. oh yes! excited to the not so maximum spider yet. heehee. one time, he flicked his rice to my shirt. the rice on my shirt. great.

peace!

2009-01-13T21:05:00.005+08:00

hooray, for the final school test has come to an end. but school semester's not over. this new year, has just begun. just a few days had gone.

the park, the beach, the sky. the rings in the sky. the bicycle rides and the mini picnic. food, sure.

wasabi and chilli.
double the pleasure, double the fun. right. not this time. laugh all you want.

this, awfully nice and awesome at the same time.

good day. (=

2009-01-07T16:45:00.002+08:00

i will never believe in anything again.

and i promise when fall out boy's here, i will rock to coffee's for closers the hardest and drown to their live performance.

2009-01-05T00:42:00.005+08:00

what sunday wasn't all about.

there was some yelling in the house. not so sweet. sugar cane tastes sweeter! we're growing giants! hwahaha. poke yourself. (= and a big HELLOOO to roooooth! i don't care. no matter where you go, don't say goodbye.

just so everyone knows, high likeliness of shifting to red tracks. house hunt has been turned on. the remote lies with the boss.

if i was a flower, growing wild and free
all i'd want is you to be my sweet honey bee
and if i was a tree, growing tall and green
all i'd want is you to shade me and be my leaves

if you were a river in the mountains tall
the rumble of your water will be my call
if you were the winter, i know i'd be the snow
just as long as you were with me, when the cold winds blow

if you were a wink, i'd be a nod
if you were a seed, i'd be a pod
if you were the floor, i wanna be the rug
and if you were a kiss, i know i'd be a hug

if you were the fire, i'd be the wood
if you were the love, i'd be the desire
if you were the castle, i'd be your moat
and if you were the ocean, i'd learn to float

all i want is you, so stay with me
hold me in your arms and sway me like the sea.

just say goodnight.

2009-01-03T01:37:00.007+08:00

welcome home!

i got distracted once again. it's like, my thoughts have changed to do other stuff. anything else but study. slipped away. where have i been? the hospital. i wanted to stay there for one night. although, long enough to watch forgetting sarah marshall together. i love it when jason segel screams and sings and trashes his piano pieces. haha. i realize i do scream and sing at the same time, after a tragic lost or over nothing at all. i don't know why. maybe.

figuring out the world. a moo point, some might say. but somehow, it matters to me. even just a little. it still does.

how come it's possible for best friends to turn their friendship to love. really? why strangers meet and fall in love? love at first sight, huh? who's most definite absolutely sure that long distance is not going to work? would feelings ever disappear? tell me it didn't just fade away. no, tell her. like how he told the world before. no more bull or crap. more than ever, it's far too complicated.

weekends are here. back to school on monday. four tests are roaring near. the fifth one falls on the following week.

take my mind off the pressure now. and i bring myself to think about 2pm. haha. well, what do you know? hush. i found myself singing when jaebeom dances, i think. and i'd dance with him too. i hope i can behave myself in w56e on monday. and not abruptly burst and sing out to shirin! heehee. control! and taecyeon, he reminds me of peter crouch. tall! woohoo! junsu is like the adorable hamster. that gives me goosebumps each time he sings. and the remaining four. not really. but okay.

i think i know what i want.

goodnight, jaebeom, taecyeon, junsu. goodnight, 2pm. goodnight, you and me and the spotlight. goodnight, the earth, and all the solar system.

2009-01-01T01:24:00.000+08:00

oh so funny.

the picture of me screaming is, (haha) thanks, joe! hahaha. ahhh. shiok. and mommy went like berserker barrage. you could hear the metallic pots clank. clankclankclank. super intently. what we've done. screaming and laughing uncontrollably. loud and some polite residents we were! the residents are going to miss us! darn, i think about it again. may not happen the next year round. not the same. everyone's at their different parts and continents of the world. we might have to jump around via webcam, just to see one another. it won't be that bad, i pray.

hello, january!

2008-12-20T19:49:00.005+08:00

what i realized today.
first, a large crowd went wild, they started screaming when he removed his jacket. please, don't.
two, it's fascinating to know someone with the same music taste. precisely the same tracks. like run. it's crazy, i know.
three, nobody really knows what they want.
four, sad isn't the word.
five, i'm positive, i will never end up like him.
six, i want to get stuck in your memories, i think.
seven, he was walking backwards. watch the scientist.

listen to headfirst slide into cooperstown on a bad bet, america's suitehearts, wams, twenty dollar nose bleed. listen to everything on folie à deux, if you can.

there's number eight. it's saturday night!

2008-12-18T03:33:00.003+08:00

i'm, doing that thing i doo.

a, absolut.
b, bass guitar.
c, chasin'.
d, deepdeepdeepdeepdeep down inside. oh, you know how it feels like.
e, electric.
f, folie à deux. awesome! you have to check the album out.
g, gaaaaawd.
h, hurry, hurry, you put my head in such a flurry, flurry.
i, am half-doomed.
j, j-bum, ship jeom manjeome ship jeom!
k, knock me out with a feather.
l, this love is irrevocable.
m, don't pretend you ever forgot about me.
n, niga anim nal gochil su eobseo, nandasi useul su ga eobseo.
o, only you.
p, please take me back, please take me back.
q, quando, quando, quando.
r, singing, dancing, laughing. twist and turn. the reason is you.
s, sweethearts.
t, time. need morrrrre.
u, are a pig.
v, viva la vida.
w, wams. i don't know what that means.
x, somebody's name. could be yours. of course, it's yours! silly.
y, you're semi-sweet.
z, zzz, goodnight!

2008-12-16T10:50:00.002+08:00

snow, falling, from far above ground.
i'll help you out.
think about tissue paper, rolled in a ball structure. many tissue balls. which need to be in much much lighter mass. drop 'em. fallen.
there, you have your snow. pretty huh? awesome enough to see it over the webcam. thanks, sam! i can't stop playing the image in my head unless i get my own snow globe. (=

sure thing, everyone misses him. ahh. we barbecued. inihaw inside us for the very first time. yummay! i rubbed my tummay. over-madness fun.

one night. tastes like pink syrup medicine but better. goodbye, mr benzedrine.

2008-12-11T20:08:00.008+08:00

along way home when i passed this poster that read: 25% of the people in pasir ris make out with the lights on. (uhem!) interes-sting. oh, never mind. scrap that!

even more interesting, kempig and i were lying on our own beds. supposedly sleeping, but i didn't know how we ended up talking and laughing. laughing a whole lot till i think we had teary eyes. x-men and spiderman, i remember. and trying to talk in different accents. heehee. but only to turn quiet later when i noticed my brother exit through the door. he left the radio on. the time was almost two in the morning. i knew. i wished i didn't have to catch him.

wasn't that long ago, i met cookie monster and elmo and friends; little miss nice and naughty and friends on some other day, before. have i told you, have i. oh well. the main focus has got to be cookie monster. besides his colour blue that we all already knew, i found him, really huge. hoooge! i could have hugged this monster.

anyhow, it was yesterday when hilmi and i stayed nerdy after school. lucky, he taught me most of everything. from ketone bodies to bile salts to glucose-6-phosphate dehydrogenase and glutathione. real nice of him to write me important notes. (thanks, doc! haha. always claim to be one himself.) plus, i never expected question-and-answer session. ahhh. if it wasn't for him, i think i'd do a nerdy freeze. cookies for reward even. yes, finally. biochemistry test's on the last day before the year end school vacation. buckle up!

12 december, friday. saturday, sunday, monday. i cannot wait! much more to come. much more to live the life. (=

peace to the people. peace to you all.

2008-12-08T00:28:00.006+08:00

ahh. i didn't realize until i felt the brakes being stomped on. hard. right after someone screamed. loud. i almost wanted to scream along. i couldn't because i was a little too late to even be in a shock. and, i think i knew. i saw vehicles passing from the right side. not easy noticing what's on, at night. all dark. and then, specially noted this oncoming humongous truck. (reminds me of transformers. optimus prime.) anyway, which was just pleasant to save us from a collision. lucky to have met this; optimus prime. haha. we just laugh the whole incident off. but seriously, i was worried about the lady behind the steering wheel, my mother.

it's all in your mind.

more than ever, i need to see you.

2008-11-01T17:15:00.001+08:00

what was i fighting for. it was you.

always devoted to you.

arrivederci.

2008-10-29T23:31:00.002+08:00

all of these happened earlier today. (=
the mister-was-in-the-same-bus-and-cab: shuimin!
the most powerful energy given: jikhim's fist. (punchpunch! heehee)
the most satisfactory thing: my poster presentation. (thanks!) it's finally over! whoohoo! can't wait for the rest of them to get over theirs too.
the most peculiar thing: stranger with hands up, like he was going to surrender to me. hah!
the highest and still sober moment: standing on a chair and, hmmm.

do i want to kill you. (=

2008-10-27T00:33:00.008+08:00

if only you had seen the face, you'd feel me screaming inside. i could take the pain. i just don't want to end up in a hospital bed. when she exclaimed that i could die from it. maybe, oh kay. but i told you before. black shirt with silver tie.

if only i'm in a better form, i'd be spending some time away from the house. all i do now is stop and stare. yea. stop and stare. i was stunned the other night because, whoa. uber stunned. left hanging. meanwhile on other days, i would spend noon time with new people. it was weird but slowly, it gets alright, i think. at first, i couldn't believe myself either. almost happiness, but wasn't quite it. almost nothing close to that.

i found myself liking the sounds of broken records.

i, too, will play viva la vida!

dengdengdeng.

2008-10-20T22:48:00.002+08:00

i dread going home lately. the smell of paint, an uninviting sign. how long before i stand alive and watch all disappearing, and finally gone.

just got home and went straight into ruth's room. that's when she seemed like she had something to boast about. and there it was, an empty closet. you have no idea what this is all turning into. my heart stays broken.

i've done some things yesterday that i still ask myself why. sunday, bloody sunday. how long must i sing this song.

sometimes, i say stupid things that end up hurting people. i'm sorry, i won't cry.

goodbye.

2008-10-13T09:39:00.004+08:00

go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. go to school. never give up. never give up. never give up. never give up. never give up. never give up. never give up.

psyche yourselves up, wokay.

the previous day was so depressing. sad for me. everyone inside the house but me, was cleaning and packing stuff. i refuse to do anything at all. making faces and falling back to sleep. what's left for me. i know i don't get to save this house anymore. and i shouldn't be running away.

so, don't go away
say that you stay
but say that you'll stay.

for all those words i sing, do you feel anything.

write me a letter. knock on my door.

2008-10-10T16:13:00.004+08:00

if you had known and looked around, it's the second time today. what's with that. crappy. mixed, and all rushes back again. i just said it, you no longer care. really.

you keep me hanging on. so contagiously.

take another shot. some other day.

2008-10-10T01:16:00.002+08:00

it's october already. woh, great. not.

one time, when i thought it's best to end everything quickly. just so i could fly away. stupid things that don't make sense. but only when other matters start falling in place again, it gets better, slowly. i don't wanna leave.

i think about samson whenever refrigerator hits my mind. cuzzie jasmine and i are in search of our baking oven. ain and i made through tuesday. suzanna, who's been thoughtful. shidah, the one that needs to catch up with us, please. oh, i miss bebe! theophilus is picking up the acoustic guitar. isaac is sharing many more tunes. seokuan wore a pretty bright smile. huayyin has been silly and a sweetie. chinho, gracious as always. maylwin, that chokes upon seeing me. corinne, a real sweetie too. many people with odd behaviours. sometimes, strangers smile. and when i have time to spare, i bother to wonder what's wrong with you. you don't care anymore. seriously, where are you? come back to the ground if you're getting high.

oh, poppy. strike two. he's over there whenever i ride the train home. listened how much he wanted to travel space and leave this crappy place. take a look around. well, it's turning blue here. why did the buildings turn blue? why those painters have overloaded blue paints? everything is changing way too fast. i detest. don't tell me to pack. please stop time. oh, house. house, house. i love this house! it's too jklahuehaunhdabdba. apparently, there are no words to describe.

wish i could stay long enough to spend another christmas, right here. where everyone stays behind too.

2008-09-29T22:33:00.000+08:00

been praying a lot lately.

september this year is pretty messed up. i don't know if it is for you. well, it is, for girlfriend lines. she's super troubled and how i wish she's alright and better.

what i've done. i stood alone in the streets in the middle of the night. the waters flow on and on. lost time. travelled on foot, the bus, train or car. i rolled the car window down. felt the breeze getting to me. heard the sounds of formula one. caught the sights of formula one. attended wedding dinner. got carried away while thinking about you. images kept playing in my head.

it's incredible how you built me up and broke me down. how can you say. i don't understand and i'm trying to make sense out of you. the pebbles forgive me. the trees forgive me. so, why can't you forgive me? i'm drying out. please let the waters flow. how can i move on when i'm still in love with you. you would see me waiting for you on the corner of the street. would you come back with love. love sincerely from you. love to my name.

no one's voice is nice enough
no one's words are sweet and simple enough
no one's embraceable arms are warm enough
no one's hands are big and strong enough
no one's heart is full and strong enough
no one else but yours
you.

only you can fix what happened there.

i just say your name.

he is the one.

2008-09-28T09:51:00.002+08:00

looks like a broken heart to me.

feels like it.

2008-08-30T14:07:00.004+08:00

every stuff revolving around. when the holidays came crash landing, it's about to end again.

going back to coral school, with almost all the intention of greeting my love; the food. i didn't do so. never did i thought i would meet some of them back there. we tried breaking into our classroom. (= truly, 5/1 have been the dearest. i'll never forget.

smashing the arcade game screen with colour balls. singing and laughing. playing board games. birthday gathering. france and korea fireworks, lovely! watching china fireworks on olympic tv. making way through the crowd, dude. the word, satisfaction. this feeling, please don't stop. it's all goooood.

cuzzies kenneth and joseph were pondering where i would be, what i would do. the actual plan reaches deadline at the end of the year. gosh. what about sleeping on the benches in parks or under bridges. luggages as pillows. pouring rain helps with laundry. thanks, joe.

2008-08-26T23:41:00.002+08:00

now, may not be the best time of our lives. you wanna scream, you wanna shout and yell. but if we can get through this, things might get alright.

i do believe that god has better plans for me.

tell me how you feel, when you're in love.

2008-08-17T10:07:00.003+08:00

bullets taken in
shot right through the chest
i could have died, in my sleep
a killer nightmare.

what do i have to say about my mom. she is super. super duper with super powers.

i have so much to tell you. what am i waiting for.

2008-08-15T23:43:00.008+08:00

feeling good before. spending time together, talking, catching up, giving and receiving. sharing, especially.

i gotta say, time really flies.

if only i had a fish. but thanks to technology, i have got a page to turn to. in fact, you're more than just a page. anyhow, right now, still in a tad awkward state. the situation kept me contemplating. thoughts of obligations, unfaithfulness, trust issues. all in my head. yea. imagine, what if some girl gets pregnant. it may seem dumb but what if! alright. and the guy, unprepared, finds himself obliged to be responsible. that's just annoying. cerealsly. worse part, the guy wonders and responds with okay lor. please. and do not say nice things that you claim the person only wants to hear. so what if that's the right thing to say. dammit. just speak the truth! doesn't matter if it hurts. as long as it isn't a lie. freakish. how could this be happening in our planet? i wanna float to another planet then. ahhh. what's the probability of guys not fooling around? zero point zero zero zero zero zero. just a matter of time. i wish i'm wrong.

riding in cars can give a good vibe. sometimes, the tension just builds up and i knew, i had to get the hell outta there. caught in a mess. nobody would have liked that. interview a cheese from a cheeseburger. don't be a cheese, i'm telling you.

where did peace go?

2008-08-03T18:36:00.000+08:00

everytime i look for you, the sun goes down. soaked in the rain. when i'm a dreamer, waiting for the sun to come back again. can't help believing.

i'm pretty sure you've got new friends. please don't forget about everyone else. y'know, you can paint their hearts red and pure.

this universe, i can't takedown. swing swing to a place where i could slip off, and away to eat more bread loaves.

i can't see you.

2008-07-12T22:20:00.003+08:00

because all of these has got nothing to do with anyone of you.

when you whine, you're gone. when you're clingy, you're a goner. and you know it. when you talk too much, you're gone.

alright. well done, you guys.

find some better things to do.

2008-07-09T15:37:00.002+08:00

i just wanna know what blurs and what's clear to see
well, everything's so blurry
but, not everyone's fake
i wonder what you're doing, where you are
last night was the last time i'm ever giving in.

i told you where to turn.

2008-07-07T17:00:00.002+08:00

have you seen this film?

haaa. this is the sweetest scene. so far.

okay. byee. hungry.

2008-07-01T10:18:00.000+08:00

i'll miss you two, young and free.

2008-06-23T14:17:00.003+08:00

people are so freaking busy. start your day by plugging your ears; you wanna stop the nagging. you don't want eye contacts; cover your eyes. some people are not working because they're tired. some burnt their fingers. some just wanna save 'em all. or even help to save lives until the battery dies on them. some lost a battery. some are screaming. some watched the bee movie when it's past midnight. who's giggling alone. some landed on my bed. spain thrashed italy. i am happy. i wanna eat chee cheong fun. chehfiualhfklahuialajo. i'm hungry. my fish is hungry. they have to go away because of work. freak show!

some days, it rain and doesn't on other days. it's so cold right here and i think i'll survive.

i'm a creep.

2008-06-12T23:02:00.004+08:00

my mistake, it's today. oh, you too, can feel their hearts were contented. and i'm so glad that i wasn't left home alone. thank god for rutchel.
oranges, potato chips, cupcakes and root beer. thanks, you all. (=

2008-06-05T18:02:00.002+08:00

tomorrow, are they gonna dance their way back home. with smiles on their faces. hands held high. and tell us that they've actually enjoyed spending time together, laughing and always, the best time of their lives.

am i gonna wait and watch. just a few more days, you pretty people will fly me by. no way i'm gonna count the days down. i'll remind myself not to think. extraction of brain. but that way, i'd lose my head; i'd be dead. maybe i'll just cover my eyes, but i rather choose to fly away. i'd be much faraway, in a place where you can find me there.

please.

2008-05-22T20:45:00.003+08:00

refrain once when i am gone. refrain again when you know you've got no other choices.

because it hurts so bad. hurts worse than anything else i can ever think of. how it slowly kills. i'll take a quiet life, a handshake of carbon monoxide. then, that shall be my final pain.

i'd like to save you.

such a pretty smile, smilest.

2008-05-17T01:26:00.002+08:00

the heart thing they call, yea, is in the air.

we take over, the break's here. well, just for a little while.

smile! (=

2008-05-08T01:39:00.004+08:00

a part of me is telling me i should leave you alone
a part of me just wants to bug you
you got me torn in between the two

'cause if you're on your way, i'm not gonna plead you to stay
when all you have in mind is leaving
i told you before.

it doesn't matter if you forgot. it's fine. but know that i'm always here if ever i cross your mind. i am staying.

and that's the thing; my feelings of missing someone so dear.

2008-05-06T21:12:00.002+08:00

he tried to kiss her on the way, catching his train
she just took a few steps back
although i understand why you're leaving, she said
i wish you'd save all the time to embrace and stay
instead of walking away

believe me, pouring blood the moment you're out of sight
listen to how heartbeats slow down
the sounds made by the heart almost diminished
realize how much i miss you, i self-inflicted coma
and the way it starts racing again
only to feel as if the entire world's turning against me

i'll be keeping quiet once you say you can live without
don't turn your back on me now
i'm your fattest ginormous takedown
you take me down.

2008-05-02T21:05:00.002+08:00

maybe someday, i will find you
and champagne supernova in the sky
my star, that's what you'll stay behind these eyes.

iron man, iron man. super fly.

2008-04-30T05:55:00.001+08:00

thank you for just one more day.

2008-04-24T23:38:00.001+08:00

zhdfsiahuigfahngilhsauihglhnvjnvaoihndfklzmxiljdskall.

exactly! he probably doesn't remember. then i'll leave when i wanna.

so many thoughts. i finally thought through the way i should perish. and how could i- i know.

what am i doing.

2008-04-16T00:19:00.003+08:00

refuses to apprehend what's going on. what she's trying to mean. she said.

by accident, i overheard conversation the past days and then it just happened again, just now. tears me up big time. if they're going to leave, leave me with a drum set behind, okay.

i hope you're gonna ask me to wait.

2008-04-08T23:57:00.004+08:00

allison's in mood for anatomy and physiology. just the first lesson, the words bubbling around the head. woooh.

extracellular matrix, connective tissues, epithelium, cubiodal, columnal, squamous, pseudostratified, osteoclasts, cardial bones, tendons, cartilage, vertebrae, ligaments, collagen fibers, macrophages, neuron, epidermis, dermis, hypodermis, adipose.

oh kay. now, that's what you get when you're trapped in science. the brain's repaired and resting on wednesday each week. right. nice.

darryl:
'yo, still speak so softly.

ighuidfaohubkaubkuawkhfajlkahufisaehfuihroihasvj.

chinho:
prawny!

heeheehee.

2008-03-31T17:23:00.005+08:00

because of corinne. haha. i'm not gonna ruin the fun. so this is for anyone who bothers reading because they're bored. anyone.

1. At what age do you wish to marry?
uuh.

2. What i want the most now?
heehee. him, here with me. (=

3. Have you ever been hurt by somebody close to you?
yea.

4. Do you think you have enough confidence?
i guess so. (cough cough) yes!

5. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
everyone to live happily ever after, almost like fairytale stories to come true.

6. What are you afraid to lose the most now?
the people that i love.

7. Do you believe in eternity love?
okay.

8. What's your favourite ice cream flavour?
chocolate, spotty dog, cookies and cream; all the ice creams in the world!

9. List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.
corinne's the fun, friendly and lovely human being. haha.

10. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
oh. like love. faithful, honest, understanding and caring.

11. What type of person do you hate the most?
nooooooo. don't!

12. Do you cherish every single friendship of yours?
ooh. yea. even if the ship sinks.

13. Do you believe in God?
very much.

14. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
foooooooood!

15. Do you find it a need for you to have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
no. i've already got mine.

16. At this point of time, would you rather stay in your comfort zone or try something new?
probably try something new! maybe we can start cooking!

17. What kind of friend you hope to be in your friend's eyes?
the one they can trust. a confidant.

18. The place you want to go the most with your loved ones?
singing california, california, here we come!

19. What do i dislike about myself?
maybe my head, for its indecisiveness? i don't know. and there i go again.

20. What's the most expensive thing you bought recently?
delicious foood.

shahirah, ain, shidah, suzanna, farah, meiying, jikhim, theophilus. whenever you're bored.

and here's to big president, happy burfdae to you! (= heehee.

peace out!

2008-03-27T02:10:00.003+08:00

was pop's burfdae.

the happy people were there with him. truly makes me happy when i saw the look on his face. it was good. the cake. heehee. just fooling. he's good. cake's good. (= thanks, everyone!

okay. i better catch some sleep. eat more later!

one more time, happy burfdae, pop!

smile for me!

2008-03-26T20:35:00.002+08:00

well, i'm kinda catching up with what's going on around the house. the world? too complicated just yet. uuh. can you tell i just woke up.

it's just about time where happy people are gonna land inside. i have to fly away now. so, see ya!

2008-03-21T15:34:00.002+08:00

bass line runs 12345. 12345. 12345.

ice cream, where are you going? ice cream.

catch me laughing myself to sleep. don't!

kay, bye uh. byee.

2008-03-20T00:45:00.002+08:00

wednesday's just inconsistent for me. laughters, fatigue, laughters, fatigue, laughters, silence, laughters, silence, giggles, silence, satisfaction, joy, heaven, starvation.

ahhh. feeling hyped up by muay thai! yea, it's the contender asia. i'm rooting for the scotland guy just for this round. and damn, nerve-wracking. they just had to break into commercials. jeiaehfuiaewhfalghblahguawhl.

and this is the part where i'm gonna stop spoiling for you. (=

2008-03-15T14:03:00.003+08:00

it won't be long before this heart stops beating.

butters:
are you sure?

cartman:
i'm not just sure.
i'm hiv positive.

sometimes, you can't run away anymore. when it's headed straight to your face, stop and stare. right.

hey, i just wanna get back to school.

kyle:
shut the **** up.

cartman:
excuse me, kyle, for trying to keep some optimism.
y'know, sometimes when things seem their darkest, you just need to try and stay hiv positive. but if you wanna be so hiv negative all the time-

kyle:
knock it off right now.
this isn't funny at all.

cartman:
are you sure?

kyle:
YES.

cartman:
are you hiv positive.

2008-03-14T08:08:00.005+08:00

your guilty conscience, read my body language. last evening, train ride lightened us up and out. they came back up and we almost never come back down. defy gravity, it's believable. 'cause by night, we flew. up, up and away! thriller, thank you. my smilest, you got your disguise, just what i imagined.

now, i'm hungrray.

nothing in this world replaces young thrills and kills.

2008-03-11T00:44:00.002+08:00

you got to make your own kind of music. sing your own special song, even if nobody else sings along.

i wanna watch you dream some more.
i wanna hear you dream some more.

come, sleep.

2008-03-05T08:52:00.002+08:00

i heard pop slam the door.
i heard mom lock the gates.
i felt sam drift away in silence.
i heard frecy say her goodbyes.
i heard kemp sneeze his way out through the door.
i can barely hear rutchel's small feet left this apartment.

everyone but me's gone. and b-friend's kinda missing too. even so, i'm keeping my head up. i'll just hold on to food. mmm.

2008-02-24T00:31:00.003+08:00

fret not, when i say it smells like crayon. it makes me happy, believe it or not. (= i do like it.

and it was nice bumping into friends. just as well, i miss the rest.

2008-02-23T13:51:00.002+08:00

the thoughts of pages flying away, glass shattering, no longer sting. the things i want to explain, get lost before they come. so much to tell, but i have to run.

later! (=

2008-02-03T08:27:00.000+08:00

doubt i'm ever gonna step back into w45d classroom again. everything's changing and i don't feel some things. so surreal like i've been dreaming all this time. tell me what's gonna happen later in my life.

corinne, maylwin, sufyan, daryl, chinho, waikiat, gary, sam, gerald, cihui, joey, shahida and xavier.

or anything i could remember, all that we do, deserves to be saved.

thanks for everything, everything. thank yooo.

happy burfdae, cihui! and roundy eggs, says ovally orange.

2008-01-28T20:40:00.000+08:00

mtv's really mesmerizing and hypnotizing. got me captivated.

i say, this is awesome.

2008-01-27T17:29:00.000+08:00

dear w45d,

do you remember-
the way we move together when we're hungry or even not. the way we own the back of the canteen. bandung in abundance gets us high. everyday, we'd be eating together. the way our food boxes stacked up high in and out the trashcan. the way we sway when meiying first started off. spiderman 3. pirates of the caribbean, at world's end. and acquired aches soon after. just our little getaway. the house we drew. the sounds of gunshots the guys made. the way we roll together. taking turns to blast our music. the playlist that jikhim has, brought back the days of our childhoods. the part when abraham strummed to oh mandy. the way we sing along with the songs. the way we get by mr ng's computing and math lessons. the best facilitator we've ever had. all those times we play counter strike. the screams and vulgarities. that one cognitive lesson drove us insane. transformers. my wife is a gangster 3. science with ainoi, when paying attention wasn't easy. domo-kun the chao da bao. the friendly ghosts. shrek ears. the show we run, get it on the floor. the alien invasion lesson, when all of us hides. the part when angela left us with her sweet messages. our favourite game, murderer. the dark street we strolled to send kenneth back, safe in a cab.

one more glass for our broken souls, went down for all of you.

it was tough believing we had to end up going different ways. to think that i'd never make it through. the shadows remained. i still miss everything.

now, life has led us here. together, all those times. the house that we have stayed, holds plenty memories. and for that, i would save, since life has led us here.

thoughts left hanging for more than hundred days. finally, i wrote them all down. right now, i'm feeling okay. (= how are you doing too?

2008-01-22T00:20:00.000+08:00

it's been a lovely monday.

thank you so much! (=

2008-01-16T00:02:00.000+08:00

red tracks, orange sunshine, yellow daisies, green man, blue october, indigo flow, violet.

i'll write to you, but it's better that you hear me
i suppose i could sing, write a song to share the meaning.

if you feel this is a certain romance, then would you do the same?

2008-01-09T09:56:00.001+08:00

internal violence
i lost my heart to someone
still, i feel the pulse
i can hear the beats.

hello or goodbye, apathy?

it's hard to say, i'll be there and i really really care.

everyone's gonna be alright. keep believing.

2008-01-02T22:17:00.000+08:00

it hurts to be killed every single day.

you are the knife, i am this loaf of bread.

i rather face a knife with cranberry jam.

wake, i've been sleeping
and tell me what to believe in
you fell so far, you should have been a star.

2007-12-31T16:46:00.000+08:00

the last day is here. what's on your mind. are you putting on smiles? it's okay if you wanna put on weight. but smile. switch that to your highest priority, always. (=

don't worry about a thing, 'cause every little thing is gonna be alright.

i won't go digging up the past. at least, not for now. besides, i have sweet potatoes.

enjoy the rest of the evening and night. and i'll do the same.

merry new year's eve.

2007-12-30T22:17:00.000+08:00

just learnt something, too painful. all of your hearts could burn, if you knew. talk to me 'cause i'll hear you speak. tell me jokes, i really need. i'll laugh with you, i promise.

the new year's coming again.

2007-12-29T03:19:00.000+08:00

never supposed to come back here. it's just too bad.

nobody was there to slap and wake me up. i'd dream about someone's here to slap me to sleep. yes, slap. and no, nothing's wrong with me.

maybe anything than me ever having to forget you for one whole minute.

darling, don't lie to me
inhale truth i plead, for you're my only hope
wish i didn't have to see you leave
so much for wanting to cover my eyes
the other day as we say our long goodbyes
i nearly do.

it's tough not being afraid
even it's been a few days
ask me, i won't deny about missing you at all.

allison thinks he already knows.

2007-12-27T16:15:00.000+08:00

every christmas has always been spent with the lovely family.

i got to spend my christmas day with familiar faces. thanks, maylwin, chinho, daryl and xavier. the ones i like to be with. allison shall forget this, never. and forever, i'll embrace this memory. oops. i never meant for it to sound cheesy. no, it isn't.

suzanna and all, everyone that posted smiles on my face this season. (= thank you! i never would have known. i can't count. they're more than my fingers and toes.

and you too!

merry christmas.

2007-12-23T15:56:00.000+08:00

when my gobstopper turns blue, i would sit and wonder about you. gobstoppers don't turn blue; i used to never think about you, almost not at all. does seem as though i don't care who you are. i don't argue with anyone but you. and we did that all the time. what's wrong with us. those were the times that blew my mind.

ain't the same this time. say, when the day is blue, i'll sit here wondering about you. even when the sky turns grey, gone all dark. explain to me how did i even got started.

you stole my organ. and the emptiness you left is killing me. did i kill you too?

i might set the kitchen on fire tonight.

am i ever gonna learn to fly.

2007-12-21T02:47:00.000+08:00

every little thing that you guys do, it makes me happy. (= and what do i mean by little here? it could just be your words, basically.

ooh. what a happy drawing.

rainbow, sunny sunshine, sunny face, clouds and birdies. guess who drew this. (= and keep in mind, if only you find such sweet weather at this very hour. you'll never catch, right.

oh kay. i musn't be late. (bebe!) heehee.

good night, world.

2007-12-19T23:57:00.000+08:00

woh, i'm not gonna brag
i wasn't even gonna brag
cause i haven't got him where i want him now.

allison wants to watch the movie, i am legend! you can wonder or figure why but don't ask. i'd only say i don't know.

all i needed was the truth.

2007-12-18T03:09:00.000+08:00

watched onerepublic played on trl the other day. it's all good. if i could show you, i sure would.

saturday, when cousin serene and david got married. the church looks pretty. okay. so are the newlyweds. congratulations! (= photos to show? noo. let these unspeakable words do the untalking. blablabla. i'm done. sweet! and thanks, kenneth! really.

been through freakish moments. i freaked myself out when i thought i saw ronald macdonald came to life. he was still smiling with his funny red hair. he was looking and waving my direction. i wasn't afraid. just freaked out. and, i knew teddy bears would really be freaky someday. frecy has a bear with a heart pumping. in the house! whenever that bear's being left alone, i'd ignore hearty bear. who wants to play with it. it has a heart! ho nooo.

look to the left and right. i must be dreaming.

in memory of what i used to called it, (fill in the blank). and only time will tell if violins swell.

2007-12-13T02:04:00.000+08:00

heeheeheehoohoo
heehoohaha
ahahaha
bwahahahaha
mwahahaha
ah ah ah ah
hahahaha
hohooheeheekeekeekee
teeheegeeheeheekeekeekee
mwahahakakaka
kookookeekeeheehee
hwahwahwaa

what time is it.

2007-11-30T18:50:00.000+08:00

the afters has got you. allison, don't.

come, break me down. just like how i trip over everything you say. my hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me. so won't you kill me. so i die happy.

2007-11-25T19:11:00.000+08:00

a, announcement service public.
b, i got your back.
c, creep.
d, dance.
e, empty.
f, the same fridge.
g, only when my gobstopper gets blue.
h, hands shaking cold. they're meant to hold.
i, one thing i'm missing is in your eyes.
j, jaded. calculated wrong.
k, kiss kiss.
l, linkin park.
m, boy, you're murder.
n, nobody's home.
o, ooh ooooh.
p, peter crouch.
q, qoo.
r, riot!
s, sean mackin.
t, take off your pants and jacket.
u, unintended choice.
v, violin.
w, when? where? why? will we?
x, xmas!
y, yellowcard.
z, still zildjian!

2007-10-31T03:22:00.000+08:00

HELLOOO. (= it's raining! i should be sleeping.

2007-10-22T00:34:00.000+08:00

shadows all around you as you surface from the dark
emerging from the gentle grip of night's unfolding arms
darkness, darkness everywhere, do you feel all alone
the subtle grace of gravity, the heavy weight of the stone

you don't see what you possess, a beauty calm and clear
it floods the sky and blurs the darkness like a chandelier
all the light that you possess is skewed by lakes and sea
the shattered surface, so imperfect, is all that you believe

i will bring a mirror, so silver, so exact
so precise and so prestine, a perfect pane of glass
i will face the mirror up to face the blackened sky
you will see your beauty every moment that you rise

i couldn't see you with the smoke getting in my eyes
i couldn't feel you, you're always so far away
your voice inside my head.

2007-10-12T05:06:00.000+08:00

quick quick! close your eyes! no. for now, i would like eyes open. because i don't know why again. i don't know how i ended up here. alright. why. why i'm still typing! gee. fingers are moving. i see them pressing these keys. think! they're my fingers. AHHH.

supposed to be sleeping or finishing my assignments. seems neither. my computing facilitator could really kill me. i've been handing them in via outlook. and outlook! (pleeease, someone clear my mee-ails.) lerr.

though everything seemed cool. corinne-and-allison team, facilitator. cool air. blabliblu.

and school's gonna start and end soon! mwahahahahaha. in advance, if anyone kills me, it's gonna be fun. I'M NOT MAD. nothing like cognitive later will make killings. allison meets crazy people later. =D OH. full attendance please!

happy hari raya's coming your way!

toodles now! (=

(CEPAT, alli!)

2007-10-10T22:22:00.000+08:00

a, yes, afraid.
b, your first bath!
c, you'd feel as though he's chasing you.
d, tell me what you want.
e, esplanade is where i'd love to be.
f, quit f-love. (what?)
g, strum to the only gift that i need, will you?
h, we will rock you, hard rock cafe!
i, allison.
j, shhh.
k, take a look at these kids. (whoa!)
l, let me. i tell you. cause she said yrouaihkrgrouwingveryhdfatwsuh. (whoa!)
m, better make damn sure.
n, what i've done. you'll never believe.
o, gravity, why can't you seem to keep all of us together?
p, i could punch you too.
q, qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm.
r, (haha) rat-ta-too-ee.
s, when she's gonna give it up to him?
t, this world is actually shrinking. you got that?
u, him and her and their umbrella adventure.
v, vespa! heehee.
w, they aren't like pebbles. allison still love you guys.
x, i save xmas for y'all.
y, you?
z, zildjian!

what you think.

2007-09-19T23:58:00.000+08:00

think again, me. allison, you don't really want a skateboard. you want a drum set. (= not cheap.

class is (fill in the blank negatively) without you people.

i'm making a choice to live like this
in all of the noise i am silence
the loneliness buliding with each passing day
i'm getting used to it.

i want to light up the classroom, please. only mark that was left behind was FRIZZO. shoeprints must have been erased. s= the white walls could have been blacker. i still feel i'm in the wrong class! sheesh.

i only like break times! see all the pretty faces. =D (psst! i wanna go hard rock cafe!)

now, go to sleep. goodnight! (SNORE)

2007-09-10T21:25:00.000+08:00

that must be it. the bitter end of beautiful illusions. but that won't be all.

you're freakish.

i lost myself.

2007-09-03T23:46:00.000+08:00

you keep the air in my lungs
floating along as a melody comes
my heart beats like timpani drums
keeping the time while a symphony strums

love will remain a mystery
but give me your hand and you will see
your heart is keeping time with me

let the rain fall, i don't care.

it's a monday. let me emphasize again. it's MONDAY. =D happy my burfdae to you!

kempig. haha. your name has the letter p. you are a pig! happy burfdae! =D

2007-08-29T21:46:00.000+08:00

i lost myself big time. no more dancing in the moonlight. not even under the sunlight.

the first night we were mugging mattresses, pillows, blankets. wooden plank cracked. sheets to be torn. and then we started killing the second night.

resurrected. 15 of us still trapped in a room. we had to say something about the class. share the love. spread the love. embrace the moment. we did it all.

do you remember? the air it was before and after. from the tense still one to the insanely screams and happy laughters. everyone's heeheeheeheehee, hahahahaha, bwahahahaha. explain how i could ever loathe y'all.

on a random note, this house owns a device that keeps playing auld lang syne! the time i got home it was playing 4 notes. then 5, and now it has gone level 6. no one wants to tell me where it is. how to shut that thing. AHHH. etaeting.

bryce, jess, theo, bohao, jikhim, jiawei, rizza, fabian, amily, farah, syara, mandy, kenneth, abraham, izwan, sunke, zita, gantang, seokuan, huayyin, meiying, allison and isaac.

we make w45d.

already, you guys have been rindu-ed.

1300 at the same makan place. forget about the pact we made NOT.

smiles to you. (=

2007-08-25T02:11:00.001+08:00

i'll explain why. only maybe. probably i would.

2007-08-19T01:24:00.000+08:00

venomous? s= MOS burger. BURGER king. KINGdom. DOMination. TION jing bing. BING pong. PONGgol.

venomousburgerkingdominationjingbingponggol.

it's awesome how very bored you can be even when you're 21. =D tahahahaheee.

and on friday, the first i'd ever claimed a ball to be annoying. but still happy! my friends and fireworks! ((=

not much time we have left to spend in class. i wish i could do something.

i want to get all 23 classmates' signatures with comments on how they feel about changing classes. i want the principal to read all of everything i have for him. i want the principal to make the rain with his floody tears. i want the principal or whoever to change the damned rules. i want to own a time machine.

i wanna do! I WANNA DO!

come wish again. help me. i'm powerless on my own. i am sleeping.

2007-08-11T13:16:00.000+08:00

if i could, i would only wanna make you smile
ooh it's what you do to me.

what happened to forever?

2007-08-01T22:58:00.000+08:00

they were playing gatsby tune then the stolen song. another they, they were playing shrink the world!

he moves like beams of light
straight through this universe in my head
where i get peace of mind
i'm free from all the stupid things that i said
he's all in my head.

back of the head,
bang!
bang!
bang!